I gave my love a talking dog
Sing ovy, sing ivy,
And how she did laugh,
It's my favourite photograph.
A bunch of green holly and ivy.

We took him to St. James' Park.
Sing ivy, sing ivy,
He stayed at her heel,
And whistled like a lark.
A bunch of green holly and ivy.

He took a shine to my favourite chair.
Sing ivy, sing ivy,
They were talking for hours;
I went to sit elsewhere.
A bunch of green holly and ivy.

She said:

"There isn't much room in the bed,
Sing ivy, sing ivy,
But I've made up the couch,
You could sleep there instead."
A bunch of green holly and ivy.

Next day when I went out for lunch,
Sing ivy, sing ivy,
She packed up my things
And left them on the porch.
A bunch of green holly and ivy.

...And when I had gone,
feeling rather smug and thinking himself rather droll,
that dog jumped up on the bed and rolled over,
playing out a new trick in his head.
And when she came in the room,
it was all:

"Look at me I'm dead, I'm dead!"
And "Do you miss me yet?" he said
And "Do you miss me yet?" he said

She broke his skull with her tiny fist,
Sing ivy, sing ivy
And she bundled him off
To the taxidermist.
A bunch of green holly and ivy.

He came to me with this morning's mail.
Sing ivy, sing ivy
He smelled like a rose
With a card wrapped round his tail.

[which read:]

I love you, please come back and stay.
I wish you'd never gone away.
It seems your dog has had his day.

A bunch of green holly and ivy.